I get this question a lot. It’s the “hipper” way of asking, “Why do you have your hair like that?” (which I also get a lot), and the masked way of saying, “Your hair confuses me and makes me uncomfortable. Explain yourself.”
I don’t mind talking about my hair. I do mind having to respond to spoken judgment from strangers. Preferred variations of this conversations starter include, “That haircut looks easy to take care of,” “I bet your head is cold,” or (my personal favorite), “I love your hair!”
The other really common one I get is, “You have a really nicely shaped head. I could never have that haircut because my head is too lumpy and dented.” Don’t laugh–this is serious! I get this more often than any other comment, hands down, even from strangers passing me on the street. Sometimes it’s sounds generous and sometimes it sounds like they’re uncomfortably grasping for something to say. Completely depends on the tone of voice.
But back to “So… what’s up with the haircut?” I’ve accumulated quite a few answers to this question over my last two years of relative baldness, and I’d like to share a few of them with you. Most of these are true:
“It’s a great conversation piece.”
“I don’t like hair.”
“I was really angry one day while giving myself a haircut, and I accidentally cut too close to the scalp — so the only way to even it out was to shave it. I wasn’t working in an office at the time, so I figured it didn’t matter much. But then I got so many compliments on it that I just had to keep it.” [note: this is actually how it all started.]
“The shorter my hair is, the more free I feel.”
[dumb look] “What do you mean?”
“It helps people remember me.”
“I like to spend my time and money on things that matter more to me than my hair.”
“Rubbing it brings me good luck.”
“I look terrible with hair.”
“I got tired of people hitting on me.” [note: the haircut does not actually fix this problem]
“It’s a social experiment. I like to see which kinds of people feel the need to comment on it.”
“Ooh, I love this game! I’m a militant nazi skinhead man-hating lesbian buddhist monk with cancer! Now you tell me about your haircut!”
“It shows people I have nothing to hide.”
“Oh I’m from San Francisco.”
“It changes the assumptions people make about me as a consultant in the tech industry. I’m more likely to be seen as brazen and cutting-edge and less likely to be talked down to as a young woman.”
“Oh, thank you for noticing! I paid $300 to have this done by a famous hairdresser in LA. Do you like it?”
“It’s a great haircut. I’d been listening to men brag about it for years. They were absolutely right.”
“Does it make you uncomfortable?”
“Wigs are a hassle.”
“It’s part of my personal brand.”
“I like it.”
Posted in My Hair | 
29 Comments » | January 4th, 2008