{"id":483,"date":"2008-08-01T19:44:56","date_gmt":"2008-08-02T02:44:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.sarahdopp.com\/blog\/?p=483"},"modified":"2008-08-01T19:51:19","modified_gmt":"2008-08-02T02:51:19","slug":"the-poem-i-read-at-my-grandmothers-funeral","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/2008\/the-poem-i-read-at-my-grandmothers-funeral\/","title":{"rendered":"The Poem I Read at My Grandmother’s Funeral"},"content":{"rendered":"
Heads up, this content is 18 years old. Please keep its age in mind while reading.<\/div>

\u201cHow Do You Make a Handkerchief Dance?\u201d
\nMy grandmother is lying on a hospital bed,
\nholding a small square of paper
\nin her hands
\nand pausing between words
\nas she reads it to the nurse.
\n\u201cI don\u2019t know, Sally,\u201d
\nthe nurse says.
\n\u201cHow do you make a handkerchief dance?\u201d
\n\u201cYou Put a Little Boogie In It.\u201d
\nShe tells it to the next nurse, too.<\/p>\n

Grandma kept things simple.
\nRed lipstick, jigsaw puzzles,
\nand photo albums.
\nChicken salad on finger rolls and
\nAs the World Turns<\/em> at 2 o\u2019clock.
\nJudge Judy<\/em>, Star Magazine<\/em>,
\nand the National Enquirer<\/em> every evening.
\nBut she read the Wall Street Journal<\/em>, too.<\/p>\n

And she focused on the details,
\nplacing towels and a fruit basket on the bed
\nfor every guest.
\nSuggesting a nap if you looked tired,
\nand complimenting your outfit.
\nShe wouldn\u2019t start eating until the hostess
\nhad lifted her fork,
\nand always passed the food counter-clockwise.
\nShe kept her elbows off the table, too.<\/p>\n

But it was in between those moments
\nthat I finally found her.
\nIn between the hugs and kisses,
\nthe pleases and thank-yous,
\nthe celebrity gossip and 9 o\u2019clock news
\nthat I cornered her in a La-Z-boy
\nalone one day
\nand asked her about her life.
\nI found the pearls and blossoms of her wisdom
\nin those reflections, that narration,
\nthose worries, her hopes, and all the angles of her spirituality.
\nMy grandmother was never afraid of death.
\nBut as long as living was comfortable, she preferred to keep going with that.<\/p>\n

She loved through the details and I loved around them
\nand we met each other someplace
\nwhere line meets line.
\nHand to cheek,
\nhour to minute,
\nwe lost our barriers when our thoughts
\nmelted fear back down into love,
\nand we decided to sit in that space for awhile,
\nbecause the weather was nice
\nand we had a lovely view of the birch trees.<\/p>\n

I couldn\u2019t fluster her.
\nEvery time I shapeshifted,
\ngrew into a new awkward and challenging angle of myself,
\nshe looked me in the eye consistently,
\nthe same way she always had,
\nwith adoration and eager hope
\nfor my happiness.
\nShe loved
\nconstantly
\nthoroughly
\nand fully,
\nteaching me by example
\nthat we can overcome our egos
\nif we find footing in honesty and acceptance.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve only met one person in my life
\nwhose sole job was to love
\nand she raised me
\nthrough a family with thick, strong arms.<\/p>\n

I loved being loved by her.<\/p>\n

I think she knew that, too.<\/p>\n

– Sarah Dopp
\nAugust 1, 2008
\nRest in peace, Grandma Sally<\/em><\/p>\n

(Extra mushy thank-you hugs to Dawn<\/a>, Shaun<\/a>, Amy<\/a>, Devil Crayon<\/a>, Marcie<\/a>, John<\/a>, and Jon<\/a> for the last minute editing help.)<\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Heads up, this content is 18 years old. Please keep its age in mind while reading.\u201cHow Do You Make a Handkerchief Dance?\u201d My grandmother is lying on a hospital bed, holding a small square of paper in her hands and pausing between words as she reads it to the nurse. \u201cI don\u2019t know, Sally,\u201d the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-483","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","category-writing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/483","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=483"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/483\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=483"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=483"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahdopp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=483"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}